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第135章（第1页）

Insteadofreceivinganysuchletterofexcusefromhisfriend，asElizabethhalfexpectedMr.Bingleytodo，hewasabletobringDarcywithhimtoLongbournbeforemanydayshadpassedafterLadyCatherinesvisit.Thegentlemenarrivedearly;and，beforeMrs.Bennethadtimetotellhimoftheirhavingseenhisaunt，ofwhichherdaughtersatinmomentarydread，Bingley，whowantedtobealonewithJane，proposedtheirallwalkingout.Itwasagreedto.Mrs.Bennetwasnotinthehabitofwalking;Marycouldneversparetime;buttheremainingfivesetofftogether.BingleyandJane，however，soonallowedtheotherstooutstripthem.Theylaggedbehind，whileElizabeth，Kitty，andDarcyweretoentertaineachother.Verylittlewassaidbyeither;Kittywastoomuchafraidofhimtotalk;Elizabethwassecretlyformingadesperateresolution;andperhapshemightbedoingthesame.

TheywalkedtowardstheLucases，becauseKittywishedtocalluponMaria;andasElizabethsawnooccasionformakingitageneralconcern，whenKittyleftthemshewentboldlyonwithhimalone.Nowwasthemomentforherresolutiontobeexecuted，and，whilehercouragewashigh，sheimmediatelysaid:“Mr.Darcy，Iamaveryselfishcreature;and，forthesakeofgivingrelieftomyownfeelings，carenothowmuchImaybewoundingyours.Icannolongerhelpthankingyouforyourunexampledkindnesstomypoorsister.EversinceIhaveknownit，IhavebeenmostanxioustoacknowledgetoyouhowgratefullyIfeelit.Wereitknowntotherestofmyfamily，Ishouldnothavemerelymyowngratitudetoexpress.”

“Iamsorry，exceedinglysorry，”

repliedDarcy，inatoneofsurpriseandemotion，“thatyouhaveeverbeeninformedofwhatmay，inamistakenlight，havegivenyouuneasiness.IdidnotthinkMrs.Gardinerwassolittletobetrusted.”

“Youmustnotblamemyaunt.Lydiasthoughtlessnessfirstbetrayedtomethatyouhadbeenconcernedinthematter;and，ofcourse，IcouldnotresttillIknewtheparticulars.Letmethankyouagainandagain，inthenameofallmyfamily，forthatgenerouscompassionwhichinducedyoutotakesomuchtrouble，andbearsomanymortifications，forthesakeofdiscoveringthem.”

“Ifyouwillthankme，”

hereplied，“letitbeforyourselfalone.Thatthewishofgivinghappinesstoyoumightaddforcetotheotherinducementswhichledmeon，Ishallnotattempttodeny.Butyourfamilyowemenothing.MuchasIrespectthem，IbelieveIthoughtonlyofyou.”

Elizabethwastoomuchembarrassedtosayaword.Afterashortpause，hercompanionadded，“Youaretoogeneroustotriflewithme.IfyourfeelingsarestillwhattheywerelastApril，tellmesoatonce.Myaffectionsandwishesareunchanged，butonewordfromyouwillsilencemeonthissubjectforever.”

Elizabeth，feelingallthemorethancommonawkwardnessandanxietyofhissituation，nowforcedherselftospeak;andimmediately，thoughnotveryfluently，gavehimtounderstandthathersentimentshadundergonesomaterialachange，sincetheperiodtowhichhealluded，astomakeherreceivewithgratitudeandpleasurehispresentassurances.Thehappinesswhichthisreplyproduced，wassuchashehadprobablyneverfeltbefore;andheexpressedhimselfontheoccasionassensiblyandaswarmlyasamanviolentlyinlovecanbesupposedtodo.HadElizabethbeenabletoencounterhiseye，shemighthaveseenhowwelltheexpressionofheartfeltdelight，diffusedoverhisface，becamehim;but，thoughshecouldnotlook，shecouldlisten，andhetoldheroffeelings，which，inprovingofwhatimportanceshewastohim，madehisaffectioneverymomentmorevaluable.

Theywalkedon，withoutknowinginwhatdirection.Therewastoomuchtobethought，andfelt，andsaid，forattentiontoanyotherobjects.Shesoonlearntthattheywereindebtedfortheirpresentgoodunderstandingtotheeffortsofhisaunt，whodidcallonhiminherreturnthroughLondon，andthererelateherjourneytoLongbourn，itsmotive，andthesubstanceofherconversationwithElizabeth;dwellingemphaticallyoneveryexpressionofthelatterwhich，inherladyshipsapprehension，peculiarlydenotedherperversenessandassurance;inthebeliefthatsucharelationmustassistherendeavourstoobtainthatpromisefromhernephewwhichshehadrefusedtogive.But，unluckilyforherladyship，itseffecthadbeenexactlycontrariwise.

“Ittaughtmetohope，”

saidhe，“asIhadscarcelyeverallowedmyselftohopebefore.Iknewenoughofyourdispositiontobecertainthat，hadyoubeenabsolutely，irrevocablydecidedagainstme，youwouldhaveacknowledgedittoLadyCatherine，franklyandopenly.”

Elizabethcolouredandlaughedasshereplied，“Yes，youknowenoughofmyfranknesstobelievemecapableofthat.Afterabusingyousoabominablytoyourface，Icouldhavenoscrupleinabusingyoutoallyourrelations.”

“Whatdidyousayofme，thatIdidnotdeserve?For，thoughyouraccusationswereill-founded，formedonmistakenpremises，mybehaviourtoyouatthetimehadmeritedtheseverestreproof.Itwasunpardonable.Icannotthinkofitwithoutabhorrence.”

“Wewillnotquarrelforthegreatershareofblameannexedtothatevening，”

saidElizabeth.“Theconductofneither，ifstrictlyexamined，willbeirreproachable;butsincethen，wehaveboth，Ihope，improvedincivility.”

“Icannotbesoeasilyreconciledtomyself.TherecollectionofwhatIthensaid，ofmyconduct，mymanners，myexpressionsduringthewholeofit，isnow，andhasbeenmanymonths，inexpressiblypainfultome.Yourreproof，sowellapplied，Ishallneverforget:hadyoubehavedinamoregentlemanlikemanner.Thosewereyourwords.Youknownot，youcanscarcelyconceive，howtheyhavetorturedme;—thoughitwassometime，Iconfess，beforeIwasreasonableenoughtoallowtheirjustice.”